How to decipher dress codes. Hammer pants optional.
How Formal is Formal? A guide for confused programmers who plan to dress like traditional businessmen. |
Casual: Wear whatever your damaged mind desired. Beach jorts! |
Business-Casual: Like "office", but you can trade out any single item for a casual item. (Miloslav is wearing a collared shirt, nice shoes, and hammer pants.) |
Office: Collared shirt. Slacks. Leather shoes. Argyle optional but encouraged. |
Informal/Business: Surprisingly, suit and tie. |
Semiformal/Wedding: Suit and tie or tuxedo. You decide! |
Black Tie/Formal: Full tuxedo. Cufflinks. Cummerbuns. Bo-tie. |
Creative Black Tie: Tuxedo, but also a dinosaur hoodie that covers your face. |
White Tie: Tuxedo with top hat and tails. (Xyzzy: I feel like a circus ringleader.) |
Ceremonial: Maximum fanciness levels achieved. (The President of the Internet wearing a crown, cape, and medals on top of a three-piece suit. )
PAX: Steven Universe costume.
Guy 1: Oh no! The internet is getting stale! Whatever can we do?
Guy 1 <to guy 2>: Are you panicking?
Guy 2: I am! Panicking with concern! That's the worst kind of panic!
Guy 1: What's that sound? |
woosh President of the Internet |
President: HTML7 |
President: Canvas is now Denim |
President: Websockets is now Web-Two-Cans-Strung-Together |
President: doctype zalgo |
Guy 1 and Guy 2: ... |
Guy 1 and Guy 2: HOORAY!
Denim is now burlap! Websockets is back! C++ natively!
Meanwhile, at the W3C...
Man: I say we include a CSS tag for theme selection.
Man in Suit: Does that benefit Altavista in some way?
*The President of the Internet breaks through the wall*
President: I, President of the Internet, decree that under-construction gifs shall have their own tag!
Webrings are back, baby!
Guy 1: Our HTMLs need punch! |
Guy 2: Bring me the president of the internet! |
President of the Internet: I declare that we need more marquee tags! |
Guy 1 and 2: High fives! |
Later: Guy 1: I feel like tacos! |
Guy 2: Well you look like tacos too! |
Guy 1 and 2: Highest of fives!