Pfft, two-factor auth? We've got NINE factor auth. That's seven factors better!
Introducing our exciting new nine-factor auth!
To log in, you need:
* something you know
* something you have
* something old
* something new
* something borrowed
* something blue
* somebody that you used to know
* but you didn't have to cut me off
* make out like it never happened and that we were nothing
security feat. kimbra
Physical security is important, too.
Warbeard is at a conference, walking by an un-manned table with a computer and banner that reads:
"Max.secure, your security API in the cloud! Now with: single sign on... cryptography..."
In the third panel, Warbeard has taken the computer.
The type of security they forgot was "physical access"
Getting access to production servers should be hard.
Sparky: How do I get prod credentials?
Milo: You don't.
Milo: You need a keyfob.
Milo: Okay. First you put on meat helmet. Then you go into bear pit.
Sparky: Okay. Now what?
Milo: Then you fight bear.
> distract bear
> remove meat helmet
Meat helmet removed.
Bear is lunging towards it!
> throw meat helmet
Bear tackles you to the ground!
You promptly shit your pants.
You have been eaten by a bear.
Milo: After last week's breach, we're switching to biometric security. Fingerprints. One thumb for auth, and also pressing spacebar. For redundancy other thumb is amputated and kept in cold storage.
Cube Drone: That's insane! You can't have my thumb.
Milo: Ha ha. Just joking. You can all keep your thumbs.
Milo is holding a cooler marked "Thumbs"
It's important to implement digital security.
This is a strange joke.
Walt: We have reason to believe that we may have been hacked. One of our file-servers has filled up with pictures of beautiful young animated men kissing!
Lain: It's Yaoi.
Milo: How do you know what it's cal-
Lain: Ha ha I hear those dirty hackers love the stuff!
I think maybe Lain did it.